Finding Your Own Inner Peace
As I get older, the importance of inner peace grows. I dislike negative emotions and the effect they have on my life.
Yet, life has become increasingly stressful, with kids, and as a SAHM. I needed to take a step back and examine the toxic things in my life, and create a plan to change them.
3 things that may be poisoning your inner peace:
I replay potential unwanted outcomes in my mind over and over. Some are related to the state of American politics, the Brazilian rainforest fires, or the uncertainty of life. But the truth is that I can do NOTHING about any of these scenarios right now.
Worrying about the future does nothing but take joy away from the present moment. It can even cause physical health issues.
The future hasn’t happened yet, so give yourself some slack and grace.
I get these intense feelings of anger toward people that are unwarranted in every way. Literally most of these people have done nothing but irked me.
Anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to fall ill.
I know a great many people who have a problem with anger. The difference between anger and worry or stress is that anger is an outward reflection of a lack of peace, while the others are inward.
I seriously piled stuff on my plate beyond any actual reasonable outcome that I could get them all done (maybe ONE was more reasonable.)
- This blog is still in its infancy and needs a lot of extra care
- My Arbonne business, which is also very new
- Having a 4 month old at home
- Taking care of a toddler and trying to work with him on communication / vocabulary
- Teaching with VIPKid in the mornings and trying to enhance that business
- Choreographing a dance movement routine for my husband’s marching band
- Teaching with the University of New Mexico’s Music Prep School
That’s 7 MAJOR projects that I took. No wonder I am so overwhelmed.
This might be you. Do you take on too many projects and forget to take care of yourself? Are all you extra hours spent at work? Do you have difficulties delegating? (My husband has experience with that one!)
Finding Your Inner Peace
This is a promising path for focusing on the importance of inner peace in life:
Clear away the clutter
My new goal has become to find health in my body and mind and to find joy in the present moment, by extension, that also means my sons’ health and joy. Aside from that, everything else takes a backseat! EVERYTHING.
What can you clear from your mind, schedule, home, and life so that you can focus on what’s most important?
Change your mindset before anything else.
I want to focus on the small accomplishments. Doing yoga or walking, taking my supplements, focusing on whole, fresh foods, and getting enough sleep were the goals of each day, and if I could accomplish those, that was a GREAT day!
Affirmations are another great way to change your mindset and focus on positive, healthy goals.
Let it go.
(How dare you start singing that song!)
I have been actively working on my health since D was born. But if my body and mind are not healthy, there is NO reason for me to be pushing myself into these ridiculously constrictive deadlines for SO many projects at once. If it doesn’t happen when I want it to, that’s okay!
Let go of what you can’t control and focus on what you can control.
Give up guilt.
This mindset has given me the freedom to keep a balance. I had a Cookie’s & Cream shake from Chick-fil-A last night! That’s right! I know it’s not healthy, but every now and again, you need to allow yourself the freedom to indulge without feeling guilty. It’s good for you too!
Guilt is just a built in reaction from societal conditions and probably generations of people telling each other “this is the way things are supposed to be”. It’s not relevant to your life. So give up the guilt and live a little!
Which brings me to…
Celebrate when things go right!
The boys are healthy and well-fed. The dogs have taken their heartworm medication on time for the last 4 months. I am employing self-discipline and self-motivation. I got several sales for my first real month of Arbonne!
What sorts of things have you had success on lately? What is there in your life that you can celebrate? Maybe it’s something small, but they say that great things are built with small steps.
I love these little things… they get me through to the next step.
Be aware of negative feelings and find objective solutions
This one is tough. I did a LOT of visualization. Whenever I would create a scenario in my mind that was anxiety-inducing for me, I would mentally take a step back. I would ask myself the following questions:
Does this scenario make me feel angry? Resentful? Worried? Anxious? Helpless? (Etc.)
What is it about this situation that makes me so ________ (fill in feeling)?
How can my actions impact the outcome of this scenario? Can my actions in this situation change my feelings?
For example, if I was imagining someone doing something to upset me, I would acknowledge HOW that upset me, and what could I do to make an outcome that was BOTH validating to my feelings AND prevented me from going off on the other person.
I firmly believe in treating every person with kindness and compassion, especially family and friends in my life, and I would never want to do anything to push them away. But simultaneously, it is important that I validate my own feelings and acknowledge them (and not just push them down to explode out at a later time.)
Often, the result was to, as calmly as possible, tell the person how the situation made me feel and then either 1.) discuss it further with that person OR 2.) agree to let it go and ask the other person to do the same but keep it in mind for the future.
It’s difficult to find a balance, but it’s possible!
So has anything changed for me?
I’m not perfectly stable yet, and I still feel as if I’ve taken on too much. But I’m generally happier and able to focus on the important things in life. Not being so immersed in my work/projects also allows me to focus more attention on other people/beings in my life that deserve my affection, like my sons and my husband!
So overall, I’ve had a great month, and it’s only just beginning!
I wonder if there’s anything else positive that will naturally happen? Here’s hoping! I’ve decided to give some thought to the importance of inner peace in my life, and it has been helpful to living my best life.
What sorts of things can you do today to enhance your own inner peace? Let me know in the comments below!